marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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