Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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