I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
