Three words: puerto rican gang bang
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
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