i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
