Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
