we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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