I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize