There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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