So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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