the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
