You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Randomize
