'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
