Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
