somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
