we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Randomize
