OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
