Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize