Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
