id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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