oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Randomize
