how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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