Ketchup is God's man juice
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize