I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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