hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
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