some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I have a pirate flag
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize