remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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