why im i the only drunk person in the library?
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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