Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
