I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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