Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
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