I think about you every night.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
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Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
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It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos