You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
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This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
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He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.