Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support

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(313): I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support http://tfl.nu/by3u

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(515): View more from Iowa

Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines

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(515): Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines http://tfl.nu/x6qw

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(210): View more from Texas

spencer pratt says his family invinted chess

(1-210): View more from Texas

that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.

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(210): spencer pratt says his family invinted chess (1-210): that kid is like the al gore of hollywood. http://tfl.nu/qms6

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(204): View more from Manitoba

My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash

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(204): My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash http://tfl.nu/m3vz

Replies (15) Good night (7795) Bad night (1007)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month

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(715): isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month http://tfl.nu/ybux

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(314): View more from Missouri

I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.

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(314): I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property. http://tfl.nu/21gv

Replies (3) Good night (1408) Bad night (675)
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(623): View more from Arizona

Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.

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(623): Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to. http://tfl.nu/084z

Replies (7) Good night (2344) Bad night (637)
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(812): View more from Indiana

after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..

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(812): after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married.. http://tfl.nu/qc9h

Replies (15) Good night (880) Bad night (2473)
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(716): View more from New York

crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened

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(716): crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened http://tfl.nu/3r2k

Replies (2) Good night (1079) Bad night (514)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.

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(651): His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve. http://tfl.nu/5nws

Replies (5) Good night (839) Bad night (557)
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(281): View more from Texas

When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.

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(281): When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down. http://tfl.nu/j4so

Replies (2) Good night (1236) Bad night (433)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

Did you drink ALL that 151??

(1-843): View more from South Carolina

No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.

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(843): Did you drink ALL that 151?? (1-843): No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable. http://tfl.nu/g9w3

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(765): View more from Indiana

Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.

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(765): Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares. http://tfl.nu/7uu2

Replies (4) Good night (1026) Bad night (425)
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(847): View more from Illinois

sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?

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(847): sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you? http://tfl.nu/2uuz

Replies (0) Good night (484) Bad night (305)
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(410): View more from Maryland

Jk probs not coming. Tequila

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(410): Jk probs not coming. Tequila http://tfl.nu/0jgj

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