if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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