dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
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