just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
