no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
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