ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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