We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
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He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
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Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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