Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Randomize
