left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
This is my gift to your gina
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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