She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize