we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Maybe he injected his testicle?
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
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