It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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