One girl and one boy is just not enough.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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