i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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