You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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