my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
she smelled like a LAN party
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I think a kid would responsible me up
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
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