I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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