GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize