how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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