i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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